From the Ordinary Girls Series: Abigail's Wisdom and Courage — A Biblical Example of Discernment and Faith

by Melanie Alegnani

Scripture opens the story of Abigail by introducing her husband, Nabal, whose name means "fool" or "senseless" in Hebrew. Though he was a wealthy man, Scripture tells us plainly that his name means fool, and folly (idiocy/foolishness) accompanied him. This was the man Abigail was married to; the lifestyle she was subjected to and bound to. Abigail’s name, by contrast, means source of joy. One could imagine how disabled a “source of joy” can become when bound to a “fool,” one who is “senseless.” But we will see that she maintained her God-given identity and personal integrity despite her external struggles. It shows us that although she was married to wealth, she was an ordinary girl in a dissatisfying role that life had allotted her.

Nabal was a very wealthy businessman whose trade was in livestock. He owned 1,000 goats and 3,000 sheep. It was sheep-shearing season, a time of gathering wool for trade. The Hebrew culture considered this a time of prosperity and honored it with celebration and displays of generosity. Nabal’s 3,000 sheep would have made this a time of prosperity for him, indeed. The custom also required that strangers in the land be fed and cared for. Nabal had abundant provisions and was considered blessed and easily able to bless others.

Few people find politics pleasant, but all should know the seasons of life in which the Lord has placed them. Abigail not only knew the political pushes and pulls of her time but also discerned them rightly. Her devotion to God, His covenant, and His heart would reveal the truth to her. She wasn’t swayed by the direction of the wind or by ill-informed chatter, but by the heart of God and the discernment that comes only to the wise in the LORD.

At the time, Saul was still officially the King of Israel, but word had spread widely that the prophet Samuel had proclaimed the LORD’s word that David was God’s anointed King. Saul had disgraced himself before God, and his anointing as king had been withdrawn. Knowing this, Saul held fast to power and pursued David to kill him. David, however, was gaining the approval of many and had built a sizable military of mighty men.

As in all political seasons, there are those who see the heart of God and those who cannot see His heart or do not care what God desires. In these political times of Abigail and Nabal, David was taking refuge in the wilderness, where Nabal’s servants were herding his livestock. For David, these were harsh times of fleeing from Saul’s relentless pursuit, yet glorious times of relying on God’s direction and provisions. It was a time when David was walking in God’s favor and building favor with men as a leader. God was preparing him to become the official King of Israel.

Scripture says of Nabal and Abigail: “She was an intelligent and beautiful woman, but her husband, a Calebite, was harsh and evil in his dealings.” Abigail’s story proves this well. This ordinary girl, to her husband and the world, accomplishes extraordinary things because of a combination of the gifts God had infused in her and her respect and devotion to Him and His ways.

Because David and his men had been in the wilderness and had protected Nabal’s servants and livestock, and because it was shearing season, a time of prosperity, generosity, and celebration, David sent ten young men (a formal delegation) to deliver a message (important enough to be delivered by delegation) to Nabal. They were to greet Nabal in David’s name (an honor). The men were told to say, “Long life to you and peace to you and to your house and to all that belongs to you.” This is a greeting of blessing, honor, and goodwill.

Then they were to say to him that since it is time for shearing and since his shepherds were protected by David and his men from harassment and theft during their herding time away in the pastures of Carmel and since it is the time of feasting, prosperity, celebration, and benevolence, “Please give whatever you can spare to your servants and to your son David.” In his message to Nabal, David encouraged him to verify his story of protection by asking his servants whether it was true. To many, it would have been a great honor to be greeted by the future King this way. It would have been a privilege to help David and his men. But not so with Nabal, the harsh man of folly and evil dealings.

Nabal replied to the men, “Who is David? Who is this son of Jesse?” This response, questioning David’s identity while calling him the son of Jesse, wrapped his insult in an acknowledgment that he knew exactly who David was. David was legendary. Nabal added, “Many servants these days are breaking away from their masters. Why should I take my bread and water and the meat I have slaughtered for my shearers and give them to these men whose origin I do not know?”

Nabal’s words reveal three things. He held disdain for anyone outside his circle; he had an abundance of meat during this time of celebration and generosity; and he showed a lack of discernment and dismissiveness toward the spiritual weight of rejecting God’s anointed and the warriors God had raised up to join him. They also revealed an absence of appreciation for the goodwill and protection given by others.

When David’s men returned and told him all that Nabal had said, David responded, “Strap on your swords!” He took 400 of his men to seek revenge on Nabal and his household, leaving 200 to guard their supplies.

“In the meantime, one of Nabal’s young men informed Nabal’s wife, Abigail.” He told her all that David’s men had done for them in terms of protection, as well as David’s request to Nabal, Nabal’s insults, and Nabal’s refusal. Now the Scriptures have set the stage for us to see what ordinary girls do when their hearts belong to Him.

In I Samuel 25:14, Abigail becomes the key figure in this extraordinary story. She discerns the situation and immediately turns to God, spiritually seeing His will and feeling the urgency. Abigail recognizes her worth and calling, and Scripture tells us that, without telling Nabal, she hurried to load 200 loaves of bread, two skins of wine, 100 clusters of raisins, and 200 cakes of figs onto donkeys. The generous provisions her husband could have provided. She instructed her young men to go ahead of her to David, and she would follow right behind them. Her marriage to an evil and foolish man had not robbed her of her courage, strength, and wisdom.

Here is a partial look at the message Abigail spoke personally to David as she fell to his feet (showing her humble submission, understanding of his anger, and giving him the respect due to a king), “My lord, may the blame be on me alone, but please let your servant speak to you… pay no attention to this scoundrel Nabal…I, your servant, did not see my lord’s young men… Now, my lord, as surely as the LORD (Jehovah, God of covenant) lives… since the LORD has held you back from bloodshed and avenging yourself… Now let this gift… be given to the young men who follow you. Please forgive your servant’s offense, for the LORD will surely make a lasting dynasty for my lord because he fights the LORD’s battles. May no evil be found in you as long as you live… then the life of my lord will be bound securely by the LORD your God in the bundle of the living. But He shall fling away the lives of your enemies like stones from a sling (referencing David’s Goliath victory with a stone and sling) … the LORD has done for my lord all the good He promised, and when… you [are] ruler over Israel… [you] will have no remorse or guilt of conscience over needless bloodshed and revenge.”

Wow! Her wisdom! Her understanding! Her diplomacy! Her appeal to David’s devotion to the LORD. Her understanding of the heart of God, which David also knew. Her fear of the LORD (her understanding of His holiness, and His governance of seed, plant, and harvest – that man brings harvests to themselves by their actions). This woman was extraordinary on this day! She was everything God designed her to be!

The rest of the story: David did listen to her and was moved by her wisdom and advice. The LORD blessed her words and they corrected his heart. He accepted her offer, his anger subsided, and he acknowledged that she had been sent to him by God. Abigail returned home to a drunk husband, drunk on the wine he was celebrating his prosperity with, which he would not share. She decided to wait until he sobered up to tell him what she had done and what his folly had almost cost him. The next morning, she told Nabal everything, and the Scripture tells us that at her words, “his heart failed within him and he became like a stone.” About ten days later, the LORD struck Nabal dead. His harvest came for him.

When David heard that Nabal was dead, he blessed the LORD for preventing him from avenging Nabal’s evil, for the LORD brought Nabal’s wickedness down upon his head. Then David “sent word to Abigail, asking her to become his wife.” Abigail accepted and became his wife. In the same passage, Scripture tells us that David also married Ahinoam of Jezreel. So did Abigail go to live out a romantic fairy-tale life with David? It doesn’t look like it.

However, for the times and culture she lived in, she got quite a lot. What Abigail did get was respect, provision, and gratitude. David recognized her for her value, wisdom, and counsel. In my humble opinion, she received something better than romance. I Chronicles 3:1 tells us that Abigail had a son. What Abigail received is more valuable than can be expressed. The LORD’s favor, her story in His Word, her integrity recognized and appreciated, and family – a legacy indeed.

Leaning in for Revelations

The stories that God shares with us in the Bible are deep, layered revelations meant for those sincerely seeking the Truth—those who love Him and want to know Him as fully as possible. The questions below are designed to foster deeper reflection and connection with the Holy Spirit. These stories are complex and cannot be applied in a one-size-fits-all way. They require prayer, Holy Spirit wisdom, and discernment before being applied to a woman’s life. Every word in Scripture aims to draw us closer to God's heart, to teach principles, and to shape character. Abigail’s story is specific to her situation. While the wisdom it contains is for everyone, each person’s story and circumstances are unique. Thus, we should apply the underlying principles, not copy exact actions or words. I urge you to read I Samuel 25:2-43 to hear Abigail’s story from the actual Word of God.

1. Why do you think the servant went to Abigail and told her what had happened?

2. One of the things the servant said to Abigail was, “Now consider carefully what you must do because disaster looms over our master and all his household. For he is such a scoundrel that nobody can speak to him!” What do you think about the servant's boldness to speak this openly and bluntly about Nabal to Abigail?

3. What do you think the strategy was behind Abigail not telling Nabal that she was riding out with supplies to David? Would this be the correct strategy in every woman’s situation?

4. What do you think about Abigail’s blunt words to David about her husband? What do you think many churchgoers today would say about Abigail expressing these truthful, yet disparaging, words about her husband?

5. Should a woman keep her husband’s shameful secrets? How can she have the wisdom to know whether, how, when, and to whom she should reveal these raw thoughts/observances about her husband’s character?

6. What do you think about the outcome of Abigail’s story? She became the King of Israel’s wife, but she was one among several. Consider the reality of what she gained once the LORD removed her from her bond to Nabal. Speak to the Lord about it, and let Him speak to you. Journal your thoughts, your conversation with the Lord, and the revelations you receive.